uh oh, look out, negativity

There are a few people in the world I would like to punch.

“Punch” has a broad definition, depending on the person. For some people, like Nicolas Cage, it’s just an irritated flick on the nose. For others, like Jon Gosselin or Megan Fox, it’s a pretty solid slap.

But today I’ve added Uwe Boll to the list of people I honest-to-God just wanna punch.

Before today, Uwe Boll was just an object of my amused scorn. He’s the director responsible for such terrible fare as “BloodRayne,” “In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale,” and “Postal,” an attempt to satirize 9/11 that garnered a whole 8% approval rating on RottenTomatoes (twice as high as the other two!). I’ve actually seen both “BloodRayne” and that Dungeon Seige thing, and they were both moderately entertaining in a Sci Fi Channel Original kind of way. But generally, Uwe Boll is regarded as one of the worst directors in the world.

But today Cinematical discovered that Boll has made – not “is making” or “is planning to make,” has already spewed out – a Serious Movie about Darfur.

I think the situation in Sudan suffered from the short attention span of the news cycle, and it does need to be reintroduced to the world at large. This cartoon surfaced recently:

It’s not precisely related, but it still reminds us that there are much more horrible things happening in the world than the Gosselin’s divorce. That said, Darfur getting publicity from Uwe Boll is about as helpful as Michael Moore suddenly becoming Secretary of State. The trailer itself isn’t too bad, but the article describes some of his directing techniques, and let’s just say they’re worthy of being punched in the face.

Oh, Michael Moore is another guy who’d get slapped. Well, maybe he’s just a nose-flick guy. Anyway. Do you trust Boll (or any director, for that matter) to make a film about Darfur? And out of curiosity, which famous person would you slap?