FBFF: Thankful

Thanksgiving is almost here!  Apparently it’s FBFF tradition to post about what we’re thankful for on this Friday before the holiday.  For me, Thanksgiving has always been a deeply religious day, a day to be thankful for the blessings in our lives.  Yes, those blessings include football and a ton of food and pie, but there’s a lot more to think about on Thanksgiving.

I’m thankful to be where I am with my life right now.  My big grad-school plans fell apart after two attempts, and after the second, I was dropped into a dark awful hole of worthlessness and failure that I still sometimes struggle with.  International education was my fallback, since “famous author” wasn’t likely to go on my resume right out of college.  But things don’t go the way we expect them to, I guess, and our move to Vancouver closed that chapter of my life and started a new one – so far, a really good one.  We’re married, we have a beautiful apartment, Kevin has an excellent job, and we have the financial stability for me to work part-time, write, and volunteer.  I’m doing marketing work for our church and I’ve gotten to help with some sales letters at my job, both of which are enough to make me sometimes do a little mental “I’m writing!” happy dance.  Whenever I feel that old worthlessness, which still creeps in when I’ve been procrastinating or whatever, I remember that I’m actually doing what I wanted to do originally with my life, and it’s enough to make me sit back and say a little thank-you.

I’m thankful for my mom, who continues to support me and my sister with all our little dramas while dealing with everything going on in her own life.

I’m thankful to my friends for so many reasons: for giving advice, for sharing jokes, for their constancy, and for keeping me from taking life too seriously.

I’m thankful for Kevin, who works hard and encourages my writing and who always looks excited when I bring out dinner, even if I’ve only made spaghetti.

I’m thankful that we found a church on our first attempt that not only has a young-couples group, but that has a young-couples group populated by other Star Wars and YA lit and bad B-movie fans.

I’m thankful that there are people in my life who are giving me opportunities that they might think are little but make a huge difference to me, like the pastor who asked me to work on a brochure for them, or the salesman at work who’d heard I had a writing degree and would I like to write this cover letter for a bid?  And when I’m done with that, would I work on this boilerplate document to use for other bids?  Um, yes.  After hearing (not being told, but hearing, there’s a difference) that I wasn’t “good enough” for grad school, and then just flat-out not having time to think about what I was doing with my life in the midst of wedding planning and moving (see: June and July 2011), it’s been extremely nice to reset and make new plans and work on new projects.

Things aren’t perfect – I mean, I have stitches all over my mouth – but things are on a good trajectory.  The fact that they’re on any trajectory is already a step up from where I was six months ago.  If I keep focused and keep my priorities in mind, this coming year could turn out to be a pretty awesome one.

How about you? What are you thankful for this year?

(hosted by Modly Chic – see the other entries here!)


3 thoughts on “FBFF: Thankful

  1. This is hearwarming reading! I’m not a very religious person myself, but it’s so wonderful how your beliefs are such an integral part of you life! Thanks for sharing:)

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